It's camp time...let's sit around the campfire and discuss being fat girls, former fat girls, and all it entails...sometimes, er, most of the time, it's a rocky road...and I don't mean ice cream.
Hi Michele,Just read thru all your older posts...glad I'm not the only one who had to consume lots of meat to stay off the crack. I must say the Atkins diet, all 4 weeks I was on it, gave me a definite break from that feeling of wanting more and more and more of the white stuff. It was a relief. I really knew then that I was as addicted as any heroin or crack addict. When people say being overweight is lack of willpower I feel tempted, and sometimes do, ask them if they have any alcoholics in their family. I tell them I am living the same nightmare only my addiction shows up in excessive weight gain. Sometimes they get it, sometimes not.So many things here that I relate to especially the things you wrote about acceptance of any size. For myself, I figure if I don't accept myself now as I am then how will I when I am thinnner? I had low self-esteem and confidence when I was thinner too. What is going to change? My weight is just the symptom of the original problem. Much like my father's alcoholism, or my friends addiction to cocaine. The disappointments or lack of self confidence is still there when the food, the booze and drugs are gone.Another thing that kind of irks me with the size/lifestyle acceptance is that I always hear or see stuff about Pro-Ana sites being pulled off the web but never the Fat Acceptance sites. What's up with that? Once again, the thinner girls get all the attention...smirk, smirk.I loved the story of the rock. I think that rock can keep going - I don't think getting to the top of the heap of garbage is bad at all. At least the rock can breath good air, get some sunshine and then when the time is right just the "roll" the hell away from there!I was sorry to hear about the FA cult - ugh. OA is helpful to a lot of people, I hope it ends up being the right place for you as well.I appreciate all the self-honesty in your writing - we all need voices like yours out here! It's late, I'm long-winded...be well!Rowan
Hi.I just wanted you to know that I love your blog and I can relate to so much of what you write.I'm out here in cyber world..cheering you on. I wish all the best.
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